In the 12 step program, one of the acronyms for FEAR is: False Evidence Appearing Real. Fear can be constructive for me IF I can learn from it.
Experience has shown, when I have fear, I'm "out of whack" spiritually.
When I'm fearful, I have an agenda - I've taken the outcome back. I may say I've turned the problem over to God (and I trust him) but in actuality, I haven't. What it boils down to is my need to control. I haven't let go and I haven't completely surrendered. Until this happens, I will continue to struggle (with fear).
The best part of my process is when I have the opportunity to learn. As I go through the work it requires, I'm learning about what keeps me in bondage to the disease and what little I have to do to be free from it. Fear can be changed from False Evidence Appearing Real into Face Everything And Recover! My attitude has changed so that I can again trust God with everything - giving him all of my problems - including the outcome. I'm back to feeling I will be OK.
As hard as it is, I have to do the work - it's the only way I can or will learn. (I call it the school of hard knocks.) My brain will not learn from someone else doing the work for me!
