AS BILL SEES IT, Question 11a

What are your feelings about a slip?  How are you safeguarding yourself against it?

I view a slip and relapse the same.  They are indications that I'm having problems and it didn't just start; a slip is a warning where I need to seriously look at what I'm doing and make some changes.  If I don't, it won't be long before I relapse.

There are disciplines I do everyday to protect the peace and serenity I enjoy in my life. They are practices that many people, through the years, have found worked for them (and decided to pass the information on).  I, in turn, have been doing them for several years and have found they work for me if I do them.

To ensure the continuation and deepening of my spiritual program, I read in the AA Big Book and the AA 12&12 everyday.  To discourage complacency and help me remember my roots, I answer a question pertaining to what I read.

For my meditation and prayer time, I read several program daily's.  One of them usually "grabs" me and I spend some time in prayer and meditation.  Then I journal on what I read.

The best thing I can do for my recovery each day is look at my food; do I have it planned out for the day?  Do I have everything I need?  Are there any unforeseen plans that have been made (by my husband)?  Do I need to prepare something ahead of time?  Do I need to ask my husband for help with something - for instance, am I going to an early meeting and need his help with cooking dinner?

At night before bed (and sometimes it happens during the day) I look over my day to see if there is anything I need to make right; have I stepped on any toes, do I need to thank anyone for something that I forgot to thank them for?  Do I have any uncomfortable feelings inside?  What am I grateful for?  How did I take care of myself today?  Did I do anything for someone else today, etc.

This is a form of 10 step.  It's where I look over my day to see if there are any wrongs that need to be righted.  It also helps me to see the positives in my life.  I have a form that I use for this (my sponsor gave me) and I've added to it.  It's called a vowel 10 Step.  I'll share it with you here:

Vowel 10 Step

A - Addiction 

(What am I doing for my addiction today?  Going to a meeting? Talk to my sponsor? Work on an inventory?  Abstinent?

E - Exercise 

(Did I do any today?If not, then note it so that I can see over the course of a week, what my "pattern" is.  When I keep my body chemistry balanced, "HALT," I am better able to be in the frame of mind for the "promptly admit it" part, and the "spot check throughout the day."

I - I, myself

What did I do to take care of myself today? This is about healthy self-care - healthy boundaries, etc.  Beyond the straight up twelve step work in the "A" above.

O - Others

Where was I of twelve step type service?  (More along the lines of meeting with sponsees, or calling a program person to see how they're doing.

U - Uncover

What is that thing I don't want to think about?  Write it here.  This is not a promise I will do something about it - it's about not sliding into denial. (Like if I need to call the IRS and haven't or there is a bill I need to call on.)  Just note it here so that eventually it will be in my consciousness enough that I can become willing enough to do something about it.

Y - Yahoo

Something fun I may have been looking forward to.  This is the thing that makes life fun and can be a building block for some gratitude for the abundance in my life.

Actions I've added

Gratitude - Something I'm grateful for today

God (HP) moment -  Some place (sign. book, phrase, etc) or an action where I saw God (HP) in action in my life today.

Benefit of being abstinent - Something I am able to do in my life today because of being abstinent.

At the end of the day, before I close my eyes to sleep, I say thank you God.  

All of these actions, that I do on a daily basis, help to safeguard me from my next compulsive bite.  Without them, I know I would be face down in my addiction.